Blog Archives

Please Don’t Close Your Eyes, Because I Can’t See Your Soul

Photo: National Geographic

The eyes – the proverbial windows of the soul. They reflect a myriad of emotions – fear, sadness, elation, excitement, confusion, anger. Most novels have some reference to them. Regardless of what the rest of the face is doing, the eyes are what tell the truth. “…he smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes.” “Her eyes flashed with passion.”

No, these are windows that can never be shut.

Photo: eyebrowtips.org

Covered, perhaps, but never shut. They hold the light of our soul until we are no more.

Eye contact connects one soul to the other. How comfortable are we when talking to someone who refuses to look in our eyes? Or soothed when words are emphasized by a caring look? Words are strengthened with simple eye-to-eye engagement. Eye contact also helps us decipher what words can so cleverly conceal.

But not only do these fabulous, expressive orbs transmit emotions, they can transmit something more – the actual soul of a being.

Have you ever looked into someone’s eyes – a stranger’s – and just…known…them? Were there, within those eyes, years, maybe lifetimes, of friendship? Perhaps that is what seals the deal between Elena Aitken and her “Besties.” I’m fairly certain that is what happened between my friend of 30 years, Marie, and I when we met in college. We were picking roommates in our dorms and with just one look, one “Hi there!” and we’ve been best friends ever since. Months will slip by without us speaking to each other, but we are always able to pick up where we left off without skipping a beat. My neighbor, Jill, and I had met about five years ago, but from day one, I just knew her, almost like a sister. And my cousin, Toria, and I are closer than most, though I didn’t meet her until I was 30 years old. Same with Kathleen Mulroy. We connect on so many different levels, I knew when we met six years ago, that our friendship was solid.

Now let me bump up the intensity. Tell me about your lifemate/husband/wife. Did you “just know” that he/she was the one? Like you both knew the same dance, the same rhythm of life? What was it when you first looked into each other’s eyes that told you that, yeah, I know you from somewhere?

For me, it was a volleyball player from UCLA. The recognition was instantaneous and riveting. So much so, it scared me. I bumbled my way through the few words that we exchanged, and I turned that meeting into one of those, “Damn! If only I had said…” He ended up walking away, and me…I’ve been kicking myself ever since.

That was 24 years ago. His face, more specifically, his eyes, are just as real today as they were all those years ago. I still wonder who it was looking out at me. Was it an angel who wanted to offer me encouragement or perhaps he was my twin flame who wanted to connect? My nerves and/or shyness had taken over and I had blown it. Or maybe the timing was off. Kind of a ships-that-pass-in-the-night thing. I’ll never know for certain, but that encounter had such an impact on me, I just had to include it in my first novel, Again.

Now here’s a kicker. We have built such a strong social circle with our followers and those we follow through our blogging, commenting, and connecting through tweets …how would all of that change (if indeed it would) if we could Skype in blips of say, 10 or 15 seconds? We hide behind our words and profile pictures now, but what if we actually showed our face and our eyes? (Gasp!) Not only would we have to make sure our hair is brushed and we are out of our pajamas and slippers (maybe), but we would have to make sure our intentions are cleaned up as well. Would there really be a difference? Our fingers type one thing, but is our soul saying another? Do our words and eyes really corroborate with one another? After all, there is no “delete” or backspace button and we can’t tweak our eyes.

Sure, there will always be exceptions, but overall, where do you stand? Come on, be honest here…or perhaps we could have this conversation through Skype…

Posted in Blogging, Friendships, Human, Personal, Relationships, Twitter, Uncategorized

15 Comments

Tags: Again, blogging, Diana Murdock, Diana Murdock's blog, Elena Aitken, eyes, husbands, Kathleen Mulroy, lovers, Skype, souls, twin flames, twitter, UCLA, volleyball, windows, wives

I Got Tagged! Ten Random Facts About Me

Sep 8

Posted by Diana Murdock

When my #wana711 blog-sister, Natalie Hartford, tagged me in her post, 10 Random Facts About Me, I thought it was be a great way to open my life up a little bit more, since we are all so intimate in a blogging sort of way. By revealing myself to you, I reveal myself to me, because I had actually forgotten about some of these random things.

The rules for this game are simple:

Must be tagged by someone.
List ten random facts about yourself.
Tag four (I have five, actually) others to do the same and pass it on (it’s a good idea to ask them first because you never know where their comfort level is).

So…Let me get started.

I was a child actress and model. Under the name of Deanna Martin, I shot my first commercial for the Bank of Seattle when I was five years old. I went on to model for Avon and some department stores. In the 70s, I had acting parts in Adam-12, Marcus Welby (playing the daughter of Sonny Bono), The FBI, General Hospital, and a few others. I think the biggest highlight was playing the daughter of Anne Bancroft in the 1973 movie The Hindenburg. I stopped acting when I went to college because I just wasn’t in love with the business. It’s tough out there, but I didn’t care about it enough to fight for the parts. I did have fun while it lasted, though.
I love wearing stone and crystal pendants hanging from cords of leather or hemp instead of necklaces or bracelets made from gold and diamonds. Don’t get me wrong. Diamonds and emeralds and rubies are beautiful and I actually have some pieces tucked away, but I prefer the down-to-earth feel of the agate or jasper stones.
I can’t/won’t/don’t know how/am too busy to cook. Never liked to cook, never was good at it. In fact, I regularly burn food along with the pots and pans. I just lose interest and get involved with something non-food related and eventually remember that I was cooking, but usually when it’s too late. Needless to say, my boys have learned to fend for themselves in the kitchen.
I’m a cardio junkie. I love running – on a treadmill or outdoors. I have to run at least one hour five days a week to maintain some level of sanity. I love physical activity. Summer brings on yard work, and winter brings on shoveling snow and chopping wood. The strenuous movements quiet my always-racing mind.
I have a nightly routine with my son’s hamster. Before I turn in, I say goodnight to Coco (lovingly referred to as “The Ham.”) When she hears my voice, she runs to the edge of the cage and sticks her nose out of the bars to grab the sunflower seeds and peanut pieces that I hand-feed her. She’ll take four or five of them at a time and stuff them in her cheeks. This lasts less than a minute, but I get a kick out of it every time.
I love, love, love la bella lingua – Italian. I’ve been studying the language for the last six months or so, and have a wonderful Twitter friend who chats with me daily. He DM’s me in Italian and I do my best to reply in Italian. Oh, he is so patient with me! In two years my posse and I will be making a big road trip overseas. I can’t wait!
I am a direct descendant of Ponce de Leon, the seeker of the Fountain of Youth. I don’t know how many greats there are in front of grandfather, but my cousins have the family tree chart that lists my ancestors. Getting them to let me borrow the chart is just as challenging as finding the Fountain must have been! Also, according to my cousin, Alejandro Quezada, my great-great grandmother was an Indian princess. So, royalty runs in the family. With this said, I do believe I’d prefer to be addressed as Your Highness instead of Diana. *wink, wink*
I’ve always had a dream of buying a big house with a lot of rooms, about 20 perhaps, and opening it up for runaways. I’d staff the house with cooks, counselors, fill it with computers, clean clothes, and lots of beds. I’d give the kids a chance to be loved and cared for. I’d help them get clean, teach them skills, and help them be a productive part of society. I’ve got a soft spot in my heart for teens. I don’t know why. I just wish I could adopt them all.
I love medieval castles. I’ve spent plenty of time on the internet searching for pictures and stories behind those fabulous structures. Maybe it’s a past life thing. Maybe it’s the royalty thing, but I’m looking forward to making a trip to the UK sometime soon to take a tour of castle ruins.
I’m very unorthodox. Always have been. I color outside of the lines. I bend the rules or ignore them completely. I don’t follow tradition, though sometimes I think it would be nice. But I do things my way. Because it works for me.