The eyes – the proverbial windows of the soul. They reflect a myriad of emotions – fear, sadness, elation, excitement, confusion, anger. Most novels have some reference to them. Regardless of what the rest of the face is doing, the eyes are what tell the truth. “…he smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes.” “Her eyes flashed with passion.”
No, these are windows that can never be shut.
Covered, perhaps, but never shut. They hold the light of our soul until we are no more.
Eye contact connects one soul to the other. How comfortable are we when talking to someone who refuses to look in our eyes? Or soothed when words are emphasized by a caring look? Words are strengthened with simple eye-to-eye engagement. Eye contact also helps us decipher what words can so cleverly conceal.
But not only do these fabulous, expressive orbs transmit emotions, they can transmit something more – the actual soul of a being.
Have you ever looked into someone’s eyes – a stranger’s – and just…known…them? Were there, within those eyes, years, maybe lifetimes, of friendship? Perhaps that is what seals the deal between Elena Aitken and her “Besties.” I’m fairly certain that is what happened between my friend of 30 years, Marie, and I when we met in college. We were picking roommates in our dorms and with just one look, one “Hi there!” and we’ve been best friends ever since. Months will slip by without us speaking to each other, but we are always able to pick up where we left off without skipping a beat. My neighbor, Jill, and I had met about five years ago, but from day one, I just knew her, almost like a sister. And my cousin, Toria, and I are closer than most, though I didn’t meet her until I was 30 years old. Same with Kathleen Mulroy. We connect on so many different levels, I knew when we met six years ago, that our friendship was solid.
Now let me bump up the intensity. Tell me about your lifemate/husband/wife. Did you “just know” that he/she was the one? Like you both knew the same dance, the same rhythm of life? What was it when you first looked into each other’s eyes that told you that, yeah, I know you from somewhere?
For me, it was a volleyball player from UCLA. The recognition was instantaneous and riveting. So much so, it scared me. I bumbled my way through the few words that we exchanged, and I turned that meeting into one of those, “Damn! If only I had said…” He ended up walking away, and me…I’ve been kicking myself ever since.
That was 24 years ago. His face, more specifically, his eyes, are just as real today as they were all those years ago. I still wonder who it was looking out at me. Was it an angel who wanted to offer me encouragement or perhaps he was my twin flame who wanted to connect? My nerves and/or shyness had taken over and I had blown it. Or maybe the timing was off. Kind of a ships-that-pass-in-the-night thing. I’ll never know for certain, but that encounter had such an impact on me, I just had to include it in my first novel, Again.
Now here’s a kicker. We have built such a strong social circle with our followers and those we follow through our blogging, commenting, and connecting through tweets …how would all of that change (if indeed it would) if we could Skype in blips of say, 10 or 15 seconds? We hide behind our words and profile pictures now, but what if we actually showed our face and our eyes? (Gasp!) Not only would we have to make sure our hair is brushed and we are out of our pajamas and slippers (maybe), but we would have to make sure our intentions are cleaned up as well. Would there really be a difference? Our fingers type one thing, but is our soul saying another? Do our words and eyes really corroborate with one another? After all, there is no “delete” or backspace button and we can’t tweak our eyes.
Sure, there will always be exceptions, but overall, where do you stand? Come on, be honest here…or perhaps we could have this conversation through Skype…