Letting Go… Again

There are so many ways to say it and it all boils down to choice.

Us or Them.  Ultimate Joy or Ultimate Misery.  Yin or Yang.

I’ve recently had to let things go in a few areas of my life, because the energy coming in didn’t come close to what was going out.  I had sped through Burnout City and crashed into the Major Deficit Dump.  And that was just physically.  Mentally I’d gone into autopilot mode, not fully experiencing anything on any level.

Last summer, I’d first written about taking it all on, making myself miserable in the process, and how it affected me.  I’m very skilled at filling up my minutes with activities or people or obligations, but not so skilled at releasing them once it no longer serves me or weighs me down.

And making the decision to walk away hurt.  A lot.  There were things that had been a part of me for months that had become embedded under my skin.  I hadn’t even recognized it as being separate from me.

But as much as it hurt to close the door on some relationships, to permanently or temporarily cross events off my social calendars, and to readjust my goals, the result for me was absolute relief.  I’m not up there in the frenzy of the mosh pit anymore, and because of that, my priorities have taken on new life.

As certain as I am that this was the best choice for me, I’m equally certain I’ll find myself back in the same predicament in a few months from now.  Letting go of the old stuff allows the new to flow back in, which will more than likely create backlog.  Then the shedding process will start all over again.  That’s just one of the laws of nature – the law of my nature.

How about you?  Do you find yourself taking on more than you should?  At what point do you draw the line?  Is there a line at all?

Three Minutes Inside A Book Blogger’s Head

I’d gone through an apple, two yogurts, and a handful of pretzels (I think better when I snack) and still I can’t remember exactly how I stumbled upon Bookish Temptations.  It could have been from any number of avenues.  You know how it is, we’re hanging around Twitter, watching the tweets, something catches our eye, we follow it, which leads us down another vein then to another.  But I do remember the blog post that originally caught my attention, and that was Sexy Sentence Saturday.  I started following Bookish Temptations and looked forward to the day of the week when Bookish posted Book Blogger Confessions, which gave great insight into the workings of this particular book blogger’s mind.

This led me to some reverse thinking.  As authors, we’re constantly looking for avenues through which we can pitch our novels and ways to get noticed.  The book bloggers and reviewers are tremendously helpful in that regard.  We all look to them to help us get the word out.  They rock at what they do:  Reading, reviewing, blogging their thoughts, interviewing us to get inside our head.

But… Have you ever wondered what goes on inside theirs?

This week I decided to turn the tables.  Tamie, from Bookish Temptations, has graciously allowed me to put her in the hot seat and to answer a few of my own questions.  So grab your favorite beverage and enjoy.

Thanks for being here, Tamie.  To start off, what inspired you to start blogging in the first place?

An opportunity presented itself and it sounded both interesting and fun. I’ve been a bookaholic as long as I can remember, and I liked the idea of having a forum to share my passion with others.

Do you remember what your very first blog was about?

I reviewed the Fever series by Karen Marie Moning. I was so nervous the day it published I thought I might throw up or pass out…Seriously.

That’s a huge series to review the first time out, Tamie.  I loved that series.  I’d like to see that review of yours!  Perhaps you can send me a link?  Okay, sorry for the diversion… So, now you have a “team.”  Who are they and what are their special areas of interest?

Debb is the first person I asked to join Bookish. I’d left the blog I started with to begin my own, and after about a month I realized that Bookish needed something. I knew that Debb was an expert where FanFic is concerned, and that a lot of peeps read a lot of it.  So I asked her and happily she said yes.  She then added Annie and together they became a super team on Fridays.

Next I asked Morgan to do a guest post, and I loved it so much I asked him to join us permanently.  He agreed to a once a month deal.  He’s an author and gives great tips during his Wordslinger posts.  He has a fabulous sense of humor too, which is what drew me to his writing in the 1st place.

Gina and Elena came next and at about the same time.  I knew both of them were avid readers, and I was looking for 2 very specific things…more reviews on BT, and quite frankly…I needed a break from posting every day. They’re both excellent reviewers and sounding boards.

Our newest team member is Katiebird.  Debb needed to take some time off, and Katiebird has guest hosted FanFic Friday in the past, so I was thrilled when she said yes.  We’ve also discovered that we’re very alike in a lot of ways…kindred spirits if you will.

Having a team is a great approach!  It definitely keeps the posts diverse.  Do you get a lot of review requests?  If so, which camp makes up the greatest percentage – indies or trads?

It seems to come in waves… a few a week and them BAM! A whole bunch at once. Right now there’s a fairly long waiting list, so I’m really limiting the yeses.  Most of it is indie at the moment.

This next question will help me as well as other authors, I’m sure.  Is there a “protocol” on your site that requesting authors should follow but sometimes don’t?

Yes… anytime an author or publisher/publicist requests a review from a book blog they need to be prepared to furnish a copy of the book. Most know this and offer to do so, but every once in a while a request comes in without mention of a book being provided. In my reply I always let them know what formats we accept and I remind them of our ratings policy. If the book doesn’t rate a 3 or above it won’t be reviewed.

Of all of the books you read, what genres do you prefer?

My personal favorites are Romance, Erotica, Paranormal, and Historical. I also enjoy Mystery/Suspense…just not as much as I used to.

There’s always something going on at Bookish Temptations. Do you find it difficult to find a balance between your extensive blogging and your personal life?

Hmmm… While I do spend a huge amount of time every day doing something in conjunction with the blog I really enjoy it, and let’s face it… I’m not being forced to do it… it’s a choice. I went on a 10 day vacation to Canada in April and I kept in touch every day, but I didn’t spend hours on it, and it didn’t interfere with the fabulous time I had. So for now at least I’m ok with the balance…or lack thereof.

Your blogging is so diverse.  What is your favorite topic to blog about?

O…that’s a tough one. I really love trying to find unique ways to spotlight my favorite authors and their book(s) for example: when I asked several authors to contribute a character Valentine during V-day week, or when I did the Gabriel’s Inferno tour.  I’m doing a fun one again this Wednesday with Gabriel’s Rapture which will be published before this is, and the Sexy Sentence Saturday.  Also, I love writing the Observations posts…they’re usually based on something personal, but I try to bring in something literary based as well.  My favorite meme is the Book Blogger Confessions every other week.  Yeah…that was way more than one

On the topic of author availability, how important is that to a blogger?

I think to have a really great book blog you need to have some good relationships with the authors you feature.  So far I’ve been incredibly lucky in that respect.  (Crosses fingers and toes having said that).

What is your take on the move from trad published to indie published and the overall quality of novels that are put out?

Since most of what I read comes from indie authors/publishers I would say it’s terrific.  Just because an author doesn’t have a “powerhouse’ publishing company behind them doesn’t mean they aren’t amazingly gifted writers.  I’ve seen some peeps complain about horrible editing and lots of errors in indie books, but I just haven’t found that to be true for the most part.  Are there some?  Of course, but I’ve seen books put out by the “big boys” that had them as well.  I have seen that more with self-published authors, but most of the time it isn’t so bad that I just want to throw the book away.  Yes, it can be distracting, but maybe I have a higher tolerance for it than others do.

Do you have a reading preference between trad and indie?

For me… I’m really liking all the indie books I’ve read in the past year. I like trying to bring attention to authors that others might overlook, and in all honesty they’ve been some of the best written and have become personal favorites…so I’m quite happy to be an indie girl.

~ ~ ~

I’m thrilled to hear you say that, Tamie, but then again, I’m a bit biased on the indie movement.

Thanks again, Tamie for stopping by and putting on a different hat for awhile. It’s good to know what goes on inside a book blogger’s mind.

Bookish Temptations is one of the many great book bloggers out there and they have so much to say, and then some!  So swing by Tamie’s blog or hook up with her and her crew on Twitter.  You’ll be glad you did.

I’m Lucky I Came Up For Air When I Did!

So there I was, keeping my head under the social media radar for the last few weeks, focusing solely on my manuscript, Souled, when what do I find waiting for me when I come up for air?  My WANA sista, Angela Orlowski-Peart, awarded me the Lucky 7 Meme!  Just the thing I needed to lighten up the mood around here.

I’ve always loved Angela’s blog because her topics are diverse, light-hearted, and always fascinating.  I’m positive you’ll love the way her personality shines through each word she puts to page.

So here are the rules to the Lucky 7 Meme:

1.  Go to page 77 of your current MS/WIP
2.  Go to line 7.
3.  Copy down the next 7 lines, sentences, or paragraphs, and post them
as they’re written.
4.  Tag 7 authors.
5.  Let them know.

Simple enough.  I decided to go with the seven-ish paragraphs.   So, here is a look at part of my soon-to-be-released manuscript, Souled:

~ ~ ~

Silence yourself.  Feel, rather than think.

I tried for a couple minutes.  I really did.  In fact, my focus was so intense that I think I’d developed a permanent crease between my brows.  The battering kept up, pelting me with shots of emotion, but finally walls began building up around my mind, blocking out one emotion after another, until there was only one feeling left – elation.  I dropped my hands to my sides and my eyes slowly opened, expectant.  Then my gaze tore through the crowd like a predator sensing its prey.  The source was close.  Very close.

Ah, there it was behind me.  At a cash register stood a boy, 12 years old maybe, his face dominated by a toothy smile.  On the other side of the counter, a clerk slapped a receipt onto a brand new Xbox.

The boy’s scrawny arms wrapped around the box and pulled it off the counter.  He sprinted, the box crowding his arms, and headed straight towards me, his mother trailing behind.  I ignored the woman and instead focused on the boy.

My energy tapped into his and sucked it in like a vacuum.  To me, it felt wondrous and exciting; he didn’t feel the same way.  He looked as though he’d smacked into a wall.  He froze, his eyes latched onto mine, his mouth dropped open, and for a moment his head cocked to one side as if he were reading something he didn’t quite understand.

I smiled.

The boy forced his eyes shut, for a minute covering them with his arm as if the darkness alone wasn’t enough.  Then grabbing his mother’s sleeve, still struggling with the box, he ran in the opposite direction.

Ha!  That was freakin’ awesome.

~ ~ ~

There you have it.  Look for the release of Souled this spring!

Who’s next on the list to give us a sneak peak at their upcoming work of art?  I hope you take a moment to check out their blogs as well!

1.  Krystal Wade

2.  Dorothy F. Shaw

3.  Karen McFarland

4.  Johanna Pitcairn

5.  Marion Spicher

6.  Naomi Bulger

7.  Barbara McDowell  

Looking For Love In All The Right Places

My childhood was fairly isolated.  I had no social life to speak of and only a couple of friends because my mother was terribly overprotective.  I was even isolated from extended family.  My dad wasn’t fond of my mom’s side of the family, so my brothers and I were effectively cut off from cousins and aunts and uncles.  We’d go years without speaking to them.  It was pretty pathetic.

I grew up, but outside of my wild college days (when I made up for lost time), my life continued to be isolated, especially a few years after getting married.  Not by choice, mind you, but there was work, family, and more work, expectations, and mistakes that took precedence over a social life.

I fell into a rut.  Working at home made the isolation even worse.  I could go days without leaving the house.  I never had a chance to make new friends.

And even though my father wasn’t around to forbid me from calling my cousins, I didn’t try to rekindle those relationships (please forgive me Toria and Maria!).   I figured since they all lived so far from me, how could I develop a relationship over the phone or through email?  It just wasn’t the same as seeing them in person.  I avoided reaching out because, if I wasn’t going to do it right, I wasn’t going to do it at all.

That was before July 2011.  After July 2011?  A totally different story.

So what changed for me?

This week I’m blog-sitting for Elena Aitken (one of my cyber sistas) while she’s on vacay.  I’m headed over to her blog right now to finish this discussion and I’d love for you all to follow me over there because I want to tell you all about how I’ve come to appreciate the beauty of having cyber friends…